I had been going through a situation with my Airbnb where there’s construction being done above me and the noise was unbearable.
So I made a quick decision to find a hotel and within an hour, move all my luggage and check-in for the week.
After that, I’ll be on the move to somewhere else as I’m on my way to finding something more permanent.
The thing that struck me most about the whole situation was how much I “tried” to respond, rather than react. I wanted to save myself from yelling unnecessarily at the Airbnb support team after the umpteenth time I was explaining my situation. I wanted to move through it all with grace.
But when you have a jackhammer gnawing at what feels like your head… moving through it with grace feels like joke.
I realized I had been judging my anger. I subconsciously didn’t find “anger” relevant. I saw it as a negative emotion. Why get angry, I thought.
But anger, combined with intention, inspires action. Anger can get sh*t done. And fast.
I needed to get angry enough for me to make a decision. I needed to stop being so nice and understanding and find a suitable solution for my well-being.
Whether it was the T-mobile specialist last week or the Airbnb support team this week… I needed to heal this part of myself that didn’t want to get angry.
Whatever we don’t want or push away will get reflected back at us -over and over again- until we learn to heal it.
In the end, life forces us to move quick, take action when we’re not always ready and to scream/cry/yell if we need to.
And not to judge ourselves in the midst of all it. That’s the real journey.
Paris, thanks for teaching this one. And I’m sure there’s a 10000000x more I’m in for 😉
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